Nina

“Community means coming together for the common good of the kids.”
-Armando Naranjo, ASW, Clinical Therapist, San Pedro Clinic

Armando meets with some of his clients at their schools. In a tight-knit community like San Pedro, schools are a great place to connect with not only the local children who need mental health support, but also caregivers, parents, and influential community members like school staff. Local resources that can help improve the students’ whole lives are shared among the adults. And, onsite interventions allow therapists and clients to work on building communication and coping skills right in the environment where they are struggling.

Nina, a 7-year-old, is one of those students. She loves reading books and playing teacher. Her favorite Disney character is Belle because of Belle’s love of books. Sadly though, Nina has lived most of her young life in homes that didn’t provide love or adequate care until recently. This left her anxious and unable to speak. But after spending time with Armando, she has found her confidence and is excelling in school. Together with Nina’s social worker, Armando was also able to help Nina’s caregiver access resources that enabled them to obtain permanent housing and legal guardianship.

Saniya and Christopher, Jr.

Saniya, 12, and Christopher, Jr., 8, from our San Pedro Clinic are siblings from a very special family.

Individually and as a family they’ve experienced challenges, but are stronger because their parents, Sausha and Christopher, are committed to building a bright future for their family of six together. A part of that commitment is ensuring that their children get the help they need to thrive.

Before Christopher came to The Guidance Center, he struggled in school. He was so sad and frustrated there that he attempted to run away from campus. His pediatrician referred his mom, Sausha, to The Guidance Center for help. After working through his struggles with his therapist, Kristin McNeese, ASW, he loves attending school and is receiving good grades.

“Therapy helps me get along with kids and helps me be confident on getting better grades.”
–Christopher Jr.

Before Saniya came to The Guidance Center, she was bullied and struggled with how to cope with it in a healthy way. Now after completing therapy, she feels confident in who she is and the skills she has acquired during sessions with Kristin, too.

“When I was younger, people teased me for my skin tone and how I was shaped, but now I love myself. Therapy helped me learn to control myself and overcome obstacles.”
– Saniya

Karen

Since 2011 and several times prior to that I was abused. Emotionally, mentally, verbally, but mostly physically. I couldn’t control my heart. I thought I was in love. I was broken down and told how I wasn’t good enough. I was told nobody would want me. That I was crazy and it was always my fault. I was blamed for the abuse. I was told I brought it upon myself. I wasn’t strong enough to leave. I was weak and manipulated to think they could change. I believed the sorry’s every time. I thought I wasn’t going to make it on my own as a single mom.

So I covered up bruises and black eyes. I had many sleepless nights from the pain and agony my body endured. I was depressed and had suicidal thoughts. Ending my life would mean I wouldn’t have to go through this anymore. It was my way out. The easy way. I was dumb to think that would make a difference. They wouldn’t care if I died. They didn’t care when they hit me. How could I allow this? I can’t keep screaming silently. No one can hear my cry for help. I prayed for signs. I didn’t realize how blind I was until I seen my daughter look down at her mommy crying on the floor in the restroom. He stood over me and just held her. He allowed my daughter to witness the assault. I allowed it. That’s the moment I realized I had to be brave and put an end to this. I didn’t want her to be like me. She’s my second chance. I want her to have a voice. To know her worth and not let anyone make her feel any less. I want my boys to learn how to treat a lady. Gentlemen is what they’ll be.

2015 was the last time anyone put their hands on me. 2016 was the last time anyone called me names, put me down, or threatened me. It took me 10 years to break that cycle. I’m 28. I can’t tell you how much of a difference I’m experiencing. I am happy. Correction! Beyond happy. Love found me. Love that I didn’t think existed. I feel safe. I’m comfortable. I don’t have to pray for a fight-less night. His love warms my body and feeds my soul. This man is my hero. I thank God every day. A year full of love and happiness. I’m free. I’m relieved. I WON! The Guidance Center made an irrevocable impact on who I am. Thank you for all your time, compassion, and love you pour into this profession. I want you to know that I would not be the person I am today without the strong messages I learned from our sessions.

Forever grateful,
Karen DeAquino

Wendy

Meet Wendy, a client in The Guidance Center’s CalWORKS program in Long Beach. The stress of bravely escaping domestic violence triggered a previously unknown mental illness that Wendy had: schizophrenia. Through mental health support, Wendy realized her own unique super powers and is using them to build a bright future for herself and her son.

Mia

To say that Mia and her mom, Araceli, are now thriving would be an understatement. Araceli describes 9-year-old Mia, an avid video-gamer, as independent, brave, fearless, and outspoken, but also sensitive and always ready to help others in need. Mia is extremely self-motivated, and is already laying the foundation to pursue a Master’s degree in Game Design at USC someday. Mia excels at math, plays the violin, and sings in her school’s choral group. She even ran for student council recently and won. No doubt it was because her classmates wanted a peer to stand up to bullying the way Mia did in her campaign speech.

Mia describes her mom as her best friend. She says they’re like peanut butter and jelly. They’re both passionate about videography, and enjoy documenting their adventures together – even broadcasting over Facebook Live so their friends and family can join in on the fun. Araceli is finishing her degree and working as a computer assistant teacher at Long Beach Community College. During her first semester back at school, Araceli earned a 4.0 grade average.

But not that long ago, life wasn’t as bright or promising. There were days when Araceli found it hard to eat, shower or sleep. She had grown up with four brothers, and was taught that she needed to be strong and not express her feelings. As an adult and single mom, she struggled to maintain this façade. Then, Araceli ran into a CalWORKs social worker who told her, “I know a place where you can go. I think you’ll find what you’re looking for there.” Araceli found solace and hope through her struggles with depression and anxiety at The Guidance Center. She credits her therapists for helping her learn how to balance her emotions – especially how to manage the impact of external and internal energy – and have the courage to walk back on a college campus to finish her degree. With time and support, Araceli gained the confidence to pursue her dreams and be the mom she wants to be to Mia and her older daughter.

Seeing how her mom was helped at The Guidance Center, Araceli’s older daughter asked for help dealing with the negative feelings she was experiencing, too. She met with Gloria, a Clinical Therapist in our Long Beach Outpatient Program, and began her own journey toward healing. Several years later, when Mia was about 7 years old, she withdrew from the world, and Araceli didn’t recognize her daughter. Araceli began to see in Mia something that had plagued Araceli for most of her life: anxiety. Mia began to feel fearful about leaving the house. Where were they going exactly? How long would they be there? Were they going to eat while they were out? What were they going to eat? She needed her mom to lay out all of their plans in very specific detail. Food prepared outside of their home often made Mia feel sick. Even when they were at home for meals, the food choices Mia felt comfortable eating were limited.

Araceli took Mia to the doctor. They took blood samples and ran all sorts of tests, but they could not find a reason why Mia was feeling this way. Once physical ailments were ruled out, Araceli knew exactly where she needed to take Mia for help. Mia was a little nervous when she arrived at The Guidance Center for the first time. But, that nervous feeling soon disappeared as she began to connect with Gloria, the same therapist that helped her older sister heal. Together, they spent sessions getting to know each other, talking about what triggered Mia’s anxiety, and practicing coping skills.

Gloria even gave Mia one of her most beloved items, a rubber duck. This duck is no bath toy, but a therapeutic tool that Mia can hold or squeeze to help her feel calm whenever she’s feeling nervous, scared or has anxious feelings. Since graduating treatment, Mia has blossomed. Not only is she now unafraid to leave the house, but she’s also become a mental health stigma fighter – starting conversations with her friends at school about what it’s like to have anxiety and spreading the message that it’s okay to ask for help.

And, while she still experiences the stressors of getting good grades and making friends at school, she now knows how to cope with those feelings and stand up for herself when necessary. Araceli says Mia has found her voice and knows who she is now – something Araceli works hard to reinforce whenever she can.
“When I came in, I was feeling okay, but when I left to go home, I felt very happy,” said Mia. Today, Araceli and Mia are still using the skills they learned in therapy and don’t allow anxiety to have power over their lives anymore.

Beyond leading happy, healthy lives of their own, Araceli and Mia have become mental health advocates in their community. They take every opportunity to talk to their friends and family about the importance of mental health and how treatment can heal. Araceli encourages fellow parents to seek help for themselves and their kids, too. She talks to Mia’s teachers and principals about integrating a better understanding of and sensitivity to students struggling with anxiety into teaching and school activities. They post videos on Araceli’s Facebook page to further spread the word. Mia is even inspired to start her own YouTube channel to help other kids (Mom says when she’s a little older). No barrier holds them back. “I tell everyone about how people in that building rebuilt me, rebuilt us,” said Araceli.

Alicia

To thrive means, to me, to face the obstacles you are given in life and  then use them to help you grow and become a better person.

Alicia experienced unthinkable trauma from an early age that no child should ever have to endure. Abuse, violence and instability dominated the majority of her young life. She was sexually abused by a family member when she was only four years old. Her mother struggled with mental illness. Her family frequently found themselves homeless. Her beloved father was murdered. But Alicia’s story does not end like its horrific beginning. Alicia came to The Guidance Center when she was 15 years old. Based on Alicia’s background, her treatment followed the trauma-focused cognitive behavioral therapy model. This evidence-based treatment allowed Alicia to work through her trauma and tell her story without experiencing any of the negative emotional responses she had previously. Over the course of two consistent years of therapy at The Guidance Center’s San Pedro clinic, Alicia progressively exceled.

Instead of withdrawing from her peers, she was making new friends at school. She became even more determined to earn good grades and participate in school activities. She was recommended for a summer internship. She got her first job. She went on to graduate from high school – becoming the first in her family – apply to college, and be accepted into not just one, but three schools. With dreams of becoming a mental health counselor, Alicia is already laying the groundwork to achieve that goal in school and within her community.

In Alicia, we see a survivor who chose to apply the skills she learned in therapy to pave a different path for herself. And, despite of her heartbreaking beginnings, she has persevered, overcoming seemingly insurmountable obstacles, and is now thriving. Instead of being bitter and resentful, she looks to help others find hope and reach their potential.

Amber

To thrive means, to me, the perfect balance of happiness and success– but not just personal happiness or success, it’s about living for others, helping my kids to lead healthy lives,  and making a difference in someone else’s life.

Amber is just months away from earning her bachelor’s degree. She’s interning at Precious Lamb Preschool and is on schedule to complete her practicum. She’ll be applying to graduate school soon. She’s a mother of three beautiful children, who are in her sole custody. But, life didn’t always look so hopeful.
Amber used to lead a reckless life. She struggled with substance abuse and had difficulty maintaining healthy relationships. Her mother had died when she was young. She was hurting.

In 2011, Amber and her son came to The Guidance Center. Her son had been detained from her care, and she desperately wanted him back. They started with play therapy, but it was hard for her to even imagine playing with her son. The stress of being homeless dominated their lives. But they made progress together in that playroom with the support of their therapist. They came to The Guidance Center weekly, for her son one week and the next for just her. Their therapist wanted to meet separately with Amber to make sure she was receiving the help she needed.

Healing didn’t happen overnight. The journey was a tough one. But, Amber hit a turning point when she realized that there were good, tangible things that she and her family could obtain. This motivated her to persevere.

With help from the community, she was able to find stable housing, buy her first car, and enroll in college. She is paving a bright future for her family.
Amber says that The Guidance Center was a lifesaver for her family, and because of mental health treatment, they all now have the tools to thrive.

Mikey

Monkey Business: A Trauma-Informed Movement in Education Success Story
Helping a school become trauma-informed requires more than training school staff about the neuroscience of trauma or providing a prescription of techniques. The heart of trauma-informed care, and our It’s About T.I.M.E. (Trauma-Informed Movement in Education) program at Beach High School, is relationships.
Effectively helping children who have experienced trauma starts and ends with the relationships between the children and the caring adults in their lives. Being armed with a brain-full of trauma theory and a bag-full of interventions means very little without the ability and willingness to trulyview that child’s challenging behaviors and attitudes through a lens of compassion and unconditional acceptance.

Changing hearts, minds, values, and beliefs goes beyond any intellectual understanding. It’s something that must be experienced, both by the child and by the caring adult. The following is an example of what a trauma-informed relationship can look like, capturing what a theory, lecture, or intervention never could: the art of the relationship.

Monkey Business
Sixteen year-old Mikey*, adorned head-to-toe (no, seriously, scalp and face too) with shoddy tattoos proudly representing his gang affiliation, is quite an intimidating sight. I would be an enormous hypocrite to judge one’s character based on their having tattoos, since I happen to have many myself. But the judgment comes from his willingness to proudly advertise his gang affiliation on his face and bald head. The tattoos might as well read; “I don’t care about anyone or anything, including myself and my prospective future.  Enemy gangs, the police, and society…” Well, you know.

It can be scary interacting with someone carrying that mindset, especially with one so young. Fear-based judgments tend to divert our willingness to embark down the healing path, blinding us to our ability to love unconditionally, to understand the “why” and to seek the wounded inner child. Where could I start with Mikey? Was he lovable? Did he still have an inner child? The answer to those questions had to start with my understanding of “why”. Why is Mikey the way he is? Here’s what I think. “I don’t care,” Mikey’s proudly displayed mantra, should really be interpreted as “I don’t feel cared for.”

A fundamental principal of developmental neuroscience is that we grow to become a reflection of what we have experienced. Had Mikey ever experienced love, compassion, nurturing, and respect? I was willing to give him these things. But how would he receive them?

According to Play Therapy icon, Garry Landreth, “Play is the child’s language and toys are his words.” Connecting with Mikey’s inner child required my ability to invite him to come out and play. “This ought to be interesting,” I thought to myself skeptically. I brought with me a heavy beach-bag full of hundreds of toy miniatures; animals, people, trees, and vehicles. I dumped the many toys out on a table in the middle of the classroom. Several of the more childlike students meandered over to check out what I had brought.

“What’s this?” they asked in a manner hoping for an invitation. “They’re for you to use. Check ‘em out and select a few that you’d like to play with,” I invited. As I had secretly predicted to myself, most chose either aggressive or protector-themes toys. I made reflective and thematic statements about their play, making the toys come alive; “That one looks powerful”, “The bigger lion is keeping the baby lions safe”, or “OUCH! Help, you’re hurting me!” I could see Mikey still sitting at his computer, occasionally looking over his shoulder towards us, contemplating what on Earth we could possibly be doing. Eventually, he walked over. “Why did you bring us toys? We’re not little kids,” Mikey asked dismissively, seeming maybe a little offended. “You’re not sure these toys are something you’d like,” I responded, rather than offering him an explanation.

He sat down next to me and began to explore the toys. He picked up a silly-looking chimp holding a banana, turning it over in his hands. Glancing over at me deliberately to get my attention, he put it in his pocket once he knew I was watching. I engaged. “You need that toy, but the toys aren’t for taking. I’ll keep that toy safe for you and bring it back for you to use next time,” I said in as nurturing a tone as possible. “Nah” he responded, “I’m keeping it.” Let the power-struggle dance begin…or not.

“You must really need that toy, and I trust you’d keep him safe for me, but all the toys have to go back with me. They’re not for taking,” I repeated empathically. He shook his head, dismissing my limit-setting. I continued playing with the other children, and Mikey continued to explore the other toys. I took some opportunities to make some reflective and thematic statements about Mikey’s toy selections, which were of course themes of violence, pain, and fear.
The time had come for me to leave for the day. I counted down every minute, starting at “Five more minutes and it’ll be time for me to go, but I’ll be back to play next time.” As a hail-Mary, I also made the statement; “Sometimes these toys like to jump into pockets or backpacks. If you find one please let him know that all the other toys miss him very much and need him to come back right away.”

Had I reinforced that stealing from me was okay? No, in my experience, I had not. I resigned myself to the fact that Mikey’s inner child needed to overpower me to feel safe. He needed to test for protection, unsure of what type of adult I was. Was I like all the others, quick to reject him, overpower him, or hurt him? So he took a toy, big deal! He learned that I was going to be understanding, kind, patient, and validating of his emotional needs even when he was acting rather naughty. That’s a price I’ll always pay.

To my amazement, at the very last moment, Mikey innocently retrieved the chimp from his pocket, as his inner child spoke; “Look, you have two of these toys, so I should be able to have one.” In a weird way, I think he was asking for permission. “There are two of them,” I agreed. “I didn’t know that. I appreciate you making sure it was okay. Yes, you may keep that one because I know how much you need it.” The next day, Mikey’s teacher stopped to inform me of Mikey’s relationship with his toy chimp. She inquired; “Mikey had one of your toy chimps and he insisted you gave it to him, so I just wanted to make sure that was the case.” I confirmed his story as truthful. “Oh, good,” she continued. “He’s been like a little boy with that thing, proudly displaying it on his desk, showing it off as his ‘little-homie’ to all that will listen. ‘The magic guy (I had built rapport by doing some cheesy magic tricks) said I could have it’ Mikey told us.”

The teacher and I agreed that the toy chimp was more than just an object of play. Rather, it served as an extension of ‘the magic guy’ for Mikey’s inner child to connect with when I was not there. The following meetings with Mikey have been different. They’ve consisted of more smiles, laughter, handshakes, silliness, innocence, and sharing of our respective tattoo stories. My relationship with Mikey epitomizes another of my favorite quotes, this one by Pat O’Brian; “May you love me the most when I deserve it the least because that is when I need it the most.” I hope I have, Mikey.

Karen & Family

Imagine a child so petrified that he could only rest peacefully while lying on the floor beneath his mother’s bed. Imagine a child so confused and frightened because she was taken from her school, a place where children are supposed to feel happy and safe. Imagine five children under the age of 10 who were subjected to countless acts of violence to their mother, to one another and to their family dog. This is the story of Karen, a brave mother, and her five young children who came to The Guidance Center’s Compton Clinic for help in 2012. Together, Karen and her children embarked on what many would consider a daunting journey toward hope and healing, but one which Karen supported with strength and determination. As a result of their valiant and arduous efforts they have grown to become a stronger, happier and closer family.

As with any sound building or structure, laying a proper foundation is crucial to its stability and longevity. The same can be said about children and the role that social and emotional development play in establishing a solid framework, one that is directly linked to their physical growth and health, communication and early relationships. Through no fault of their own, Karen and her family were stripped of their initial opportunity to build a solid foundation on which to grow their family in a manner of their choosing. Sadly, these innocent children have faced some of the most horrific traumas imaginable.

Knowing that she would be instrumental in her children’s healing process, Karen did not hesitate to engage in her children’s mental health treatment. Regardless of how tired she was after a long day, Karen made her children’s recovery her ultimate priority. Karen and her family participated in Evidence-Based Practices, well-researched and nationally recognized treatment models, designed for young children who have experienced trauma. Together, Karen and her children have learned to manage their personal traumas and process their pain.

Recently, Karen had the pleasure of attending an awards ceremony celebrating the scholastic achievements of her oldest son, who aspires to be a professional photographer when he grows up. Thanks to their dedication and perseverance, Karen and her family are not defined by the traumatic effects they experienced. Together, they have grown into a loving and supportive family and are now leading peaceful and productive lives.